The Marco Kid and the Gang of Ocho

Sheriff Joe out thar in the backcountry of Airerozona, picked up one of them mean hombres from the notorious gang of Ocho.  Senor Markie Rubio aka The Marco Kid was caught wandering in the high desert disorientated and parched.  We  now listen into the law of the Old West Sheriff Joe as he works over the Marco Kid to see what happened to a good guy who has gone south (of the border).

Sheriff Jose er Joe (SJ):   Well, well if it ain’t  the Marco Kid. All I can say what a shame, I thought you were one of good guys.

The Marko Kid (MK):  No senor, you have it all wrong. I am a bueno hombre.   I love Lucy and America and undocumented peoples of all color, creed and especially those that watch Univision.  By the way senor lawman may I bother you for a sip of some high quality H2O?

SJ:  All in good time Marco, all in good time.  So what is this bill you and your gang is pushing down the equally parched throats of the American people.  Last time I heard you were going to guard the border first,  and now  its all open borders for all.   You remind me of another of your gang.  Senor Juan ‘Gollum ‘ McPrecious or is he going now under the alias Sergeant Farter?  Wily old fox Gollum, he said he would build the fence on our border, but he got distracted when he got reelected some time back.

MK:  Si, he likes to hang around with his good buddy Homer Pile  and plot new wars when they are not reforming immigration and leading us in Mexican jazz favorites.  He is also known as Limpy Graham-Cracker.  They didn’t talk to me hardly at all,  don’t seem to like me much;  you know I think they are  having a bromance or something.

SJ:  Who you calling a cracker,  boy?

MK:  Oh no no senor, that Limpy’s last name… Graham-Cracker.

SJ:  I guess we only knew him as Homer, geez what a limp wrist moron,… anyway so tell me Kid who got to you, who messed with your mind?  Must  have been a master of psychology and persuasion.  Listen up thirsty, I want names … and a icy cold bottle of aqua is all yours.

MK:  Really?  Water… por favor senor.

SJ:  I need a name Marko  and it better not be Hey Culligan man. (Sheriff Joe takes a long slug of cold water and lets a refreshing ahhhhhhhhhhh resound when he is finished.)

MK:  You are a hard man Sheriff Joe, and cruel and not really much to look at… (Sheriff Joe backhand slaps Marko’s face at this point) ….

SJ:  You won’t be much to look at either if I don’t get a name, and I mean soon.

MK:  Ok, Okay it’s Luckie Shroomer the Peyote Punk. (Marko starts to sniffle and blurst out)…. Luckie would never let up.  Path to citizenship, dream act, rule of Law is for the little people, bring them out of the shadows,  they do the work gringos won’t, Republicans need a big tent and eat at Taco Bell more often….

SJ: Enough Kid, you’re delirious (Sheriff Joe throws a pitcher of water in Marko’s face).  Deputy get this piece of armadillo scat a bottle of water.  So the Shroomer,…. I feel for you Kid, I really do,  he is a manipulator of the first order.

MK:  Sniff, you don’t the half the story, he would just talk and talk and arm twist and talk, blah blah blah….  I just gave up.  Help me.

SJ:  There, there Marko I think you been hit by heat stroke, dehydration and flashbacks from some bad Shrooms… or Shroomer that is.  Take some time and get some rest and a few weeks with one of our inmate labor crews and you will feel alot less like a RINO than you do now.  And we’ll won’t rest until we catch that evil Luckie and maybe then we can get enough information to go after the ring leader.

MK: Who is that Senor Joe?

SJ:  Beaner Ohbaja… the one born in Kenya and now rules the land with his lawless abandon.  The one who spit in my face and said, Birth certificates, I don’t need no stinking birth certificate.   The one who says he is the one.   He chaps my hide.

MK:  Pardon me Joe, this water is great but do you have any chips and salsa?

April 25, 2013. Party Jokes, Uncategorized. 1 comment.