North Korea power struggle update: Chumlee comes Home

As last reported only here at 2teanot2tea (2T2T) network Chumlee, aka Kim Gong Wrong, Kim Bong Chum-Lee, the Chum Master, Austin Russell had returned to his place of birth (or so it was thought,  see below) to fight for control of North Korea leadership with his supposed twin Kim Jong Un, subsequent to the passing of their father, Kim Jong Il.

Our inside sources in the NK capital of Pyongyang said things seemed good at the state funeral of Jong Il  where Chumlee was photographed with his brother and other top leaders. Seen below sporting a chic Tennessee Tuxedo.

And even more shocking was to see chumlee’s large image during the funeral procession normally where Kim Jong Il’s protrait would be displayed

But soon the rise of Chumlee to North Korea’s top post was crushed by the  revelation that he was not the twin to Kim Jong Un.  DNA testing showed while indeed Kim Jong Il was the father,  his mother was a hooker in Las Vegas, Roxy Rackks Russell.  Roxy met Mr. Il on a chance encounter during Mr. Il’s youth as he toured the US and indulged in his love of playing the sports book and enjoying woman of the evening.

2T2T learned from insiders that never before this leadership crisis had Chumlee ever been in North Korea and his claim to any leadership position was null and void.  Picture of Roxy is below

When presented with this evidence Chumlee quickly packed up and headed for the next flight to the US.   When his growing mass of followers heard of this development, near rioting and public mourning was common place.

Shown to the right is group of his younger fans, that were known as the Wannabe Chumlees.  They were devastated.

But many adults, were grief-stricken as well:

Oh what might have been… So what is Chumlee doing now?

Well he is back at the Pawn Stars shop where is showing the gang a souvenior from his trip.

We were told Rick Harris asked Chum what he bought while over in North Korea and Chumlee said it was a dual action North Korean assault rifle.  Whereupon the Old Man was  over heard to say, ‘Chumlee you no good bleeping dumb bleep!’


January 19, 2012. Tags: , , , , , , , , . Chumlee vs Kim Jong Un, Party Jokes.

One Comment

  1. Chumlee not to be denied, Voted Smartest Man in the World! « 2 Tea or Not 2 Tea, That is the Party replied:

    […] to Mr. Un, but rather the bastard step brother, Chumlee  left N. Korea earlier this year under a cloud of shame and defeat in his power struggle for N. Korea’s top spot.  And now this news of  Mr. Un’s new title as the boy toy of […]

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